THE BANK ROBBERY OF THE CENTURY!

 

THE BANK ROBBERY OF THE CENTURY!

Guesskom - the fons eg origo of formalised South African crime (relax, I’ll get to the Chupta Brothers in due course – in the Southern Mafia pecking order they are not the top of the heap to my mind) - is at this very moment and as I write, busy pulling off their most spectacular crime of all time. Or they are rubbing their chubby, grasping hands in glee at the imminent prospect of doing so.

Go on, sheeple, read this and weep: https://legal.sabinet.co.za/articles/eskom-exempted-from-disclosing-irregular-expenditure/#:~:text=Eskom%20has%20been%20exempted%20from,the%20Public%20Finance%20Management%20Act.

Picture this:

There is a bank robbery in progress. In Main Street. In the middle of a busy day.

There is a spectacular circus parade marching by, with a big, loud marching band in front. Drum majorettes. Flutes, trumpets, drums, cymbals, bugles. Gold and silver staffs and batons. A glockenspiel. Floats mounted on trucks with their engines roaring, belching diesel fumes into the sky. The Queen of the Parade in her carriage, surrounded by smiling nymphs with hangovers, struggling bravely to get over last night’s orgy.

And the streets are lined by the Keystone Cops, who are all facing the parade, mesmerised by the spectacle and trying to peep up the drum majorettes' dresses. And those happy policemen have been joined by the security guards of the bank, who have just stepped out to get an eyefull.

Meanwhile, behind the floor-to-ceiling glass windows of the bank, swarthy men in dark suits toting machine carbines have arranged the bank staff and customers face-down on the floor and one of these men have marched the bank’s chief accountant round the back to the vault with crystal clear instructions to open it and then to stand back.

These men represent a sinister organisation called Guesskom, and the vault is supervised by a well-intentioned but fatally weak organisation called the Deserve Bank, so called because it has been entrusted with all the money which the good sheeple of South Africa deserve.

But the evil people of Guesskom don’t give a fig about the sheeple – they want that money! And if the Keystone Cops and the bank guards don’t catch a wake-up call – very, very quickly – the evil men of Guesskom are going to walk out of that bank with the sheeples' money!

And now the bank manager has taken it upon himself to make a rule that there is no longer any need for anyone to keep a record of the money!

I do not believe that he ever had the power to make such a rule. It’s not his money, dammit, it’s OUR money. He needs to be hung from the nearest tree. To the music of a marching band.

 

©HARRY FRIEDLAND

2023 04 03